Tag Archives: teen

The Experience

Wow, would you think it’s been a year since I set this shit up? And look what’s happened since then. I told you guys about One Direction, now they’ve taken over the whole fucking planet. I dyed my hair red this time last year, and it’s really been something I regret with every inch of my being, as its completely ruined my hair. 


Well as there’s so much i could possibly say, i suppose I better start with something rather comical. 

So basically, a nightclub where I live has an under eighteen night every so often, and of course my friends had been bugging me bugging me to go with them too. Eventually the night came about, and this venture began.

So my friend (who has been before to this place on many an occasion) walk in and BOOM hit with wave 5ft boys that smelt like hair gel and gravy and girls with bright orange complexions, bright pink lips and the darkest eyeliner I’ve ever seen in my life (that was no make up, that was fucking war paint). Bright lights, loud music and security at every corner watching our every moves, i couldn’t help but laugh and marvel and the outfits and behavior  of what represented people my age.

In all honesty it was like Animal Planet or some shit. and then, i was approached.

A boy that looked more pond life that human basically asked me to ‘make out’ with him. What did I say? NO. And i did the entire night.

But this was like some sort of sport for these people. Kissing going on everywhere I looked and god knows what going on everywhere else. I know maybe you reading this won’t find it particularly hilarious, but i was for me. And all i want to know now is, what the fuck were those poor security men thinking that whole time.

But really? is this how my generation is going to be depicted? I’ll never understand why we get so much shit for the things we do, because as far as I can gather, my parents did the exact same things we did.


They, however, did not get caught.

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Proof of Existence

No, readers, your eyes do not deceive you, this really is a blog post…by me.

I’m sorry, okay, it’s just, well you know the story-  a lot of shits been going down recently. My family is pissed off for variety of reasons, my friends were pissed off for a variety of reasons (one of them being me) and I was pissed off for all of the above.  But don’t expect me to start writing depressed Facebook status’ ( I got twitter now #lolzzz (Go on, try and find me, and get a special prize) this in turn means Facebook can do a bebo and die, essentially.

Just to sum up how LONG I’ve been ignoring you all let go through what’s happened since I was last on here shall we;

  • One Direction are just about everywhere, bitches, I found them first
  • I discovered a multitude of Youtubers: Bertiebertg, Sezrules, Bribry etc, etc.
  • Demi Lovato skyped Niall Horan an the world went insane
  • I discovered Bribry and I went insane ( Sum Me Up is such a good song, I just cant take it anymore)
  • Call Me Maybe. Enough said.
  • I saw The Avengers (or as it’s called in the UK for some extremelyirrelevant reason ‘Marvel’s Avengers Assemble) and went into 100% Iron Man/Thor/Captain America/ Hawkeye’s shite/Robert Downey Jr > Life/asdfghj rampage.
  • I sat exams – I shan’t go in to the gory details, all is best forgotten.
  • Being British is now apparently something to be proud of, 2012 means The Jubilee and The Olympics etc. But hold on, when we reach January 1st 2013, the government and everyone else will be thinking WHAT THE FUCK WILL WE DO NOW?! 
  • Also, the government has no money, supposedly, yet I question who paid for Will.I.Am ( also known as ‘That’s dope’ or ‘William’) to jump about a stage on top of a fountain?
  • The Voice turned into X Factor in a shockingly short amount of time.
  • Miley Cyrus got engaged. Yep.

You know your life has reached the peak of RIVETING when you’re watching Cash in The Attic on a Sunday evening pr-evening. Bazinga.


I went to church today. I could FEEL the eyes of pensioners judging and analysing my being. I sat with my Dad, another non-church goer, and we sat trying not to laugh. Also, I got stopped in the street by ‘Do you have moment for God?’ and I stood there awkwardly while Christian friend chatted with him happily. It’s a sign. Amen.


I got a Blackberry and I’ve hated myself ever since, seriously, it’s just terrible, I switching to IPhone as soon as I possibly can.

Anyway, this blog had no particular topic other than letting you all know I was alive. Alright then. Bye.

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Remember these utterly loveable clampets?


Yeah! Busted! The soft punk/rock/pop boyband that my eight year old self feel in love with.
I found their album under my bed when I did some tidying up (yeah I know I tidied my room! Shocker lawds, shocker!) and played it on my old stereo-the one that can actually play CDs- I’m very pro-iPod at the moment- and it brought back a lot of memories. Mostly of bouncing on my bed with my best friend singing along to the songs, dancing around my bedroom and flickering the light switch so we had our own ‘concert’.
I also realise that for once I actually understand the lyrics- full of teenage love, angst (yeah-I said the A word) and fanciful ideas of both teachers and air hostesses. Yah…So that’s something…

As I’m writing this I’m tempted to air guitar to the music I’m playing- THIS IS WHAT 30 SECONDS TO MARS DOES TO ME!
I know all the words to Kings and Queens- which again, got me more musical kudos from the males in my class. I’m starting to wonder why I’m as boyish as I am- I live in a house full of girls (apart from dad) I have more aunts than uncles, two thirds of my cousins are female (I’m the oldest grandchild on both sides of my family). My taste in music is pretty masculine or not typically ‘ladylike’ and as we know, so is my sense of humour- Im yet to find another GIRL in my year that sits up watching Dave with her dad on a boring Friday night and can recite all the gags from Mock the Week…like I can.

You have no idea how good this Busted CD is, it may be cheesy, but it’s really good. I’ll start humming You Said No in class tomorrow and see who can recognised the tune. I can’t believe no ones talked about them since they split, it’s just classic teen rock out music. Before Mcfly came along and ruined it all.

Sorry I couldn’t resist it 🙂

It kinda feels like a wasted weekend- I slept most of the morning today- spent yesterday visiting relatives.
Oh and I tried a deep fried Mars Bar today- it’s sort of a been there done that thing- I can feel the saturated fat growing on my thighs with every mouthful.

I’m now the proud owner of every single album Busted thanks to iTunes- you have no idea how proud I am of this fact.

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Welcome the Tin Grin!

Ugh, did you know I’m getting braces on Friday? TOMORROW?!
Yeah, proper braces. Real ones. The type a train could run on.
I’ve swore to myself I’ll never where my glasses again or I’ll run a risk of being an Ugly Betty lookalike.

This blog isn’t anything particular or exciting it’s just a jumpfrom random subject to another- FYI.

I have no idea what happened over summer but suddenly everyones a lot more pleasant. I suppose it was first year last year and everyone was highly strung- but everyones just more civil.

Hey I’ve got a new stalker!
I wouldn’t call myself ‘cool’ or in the ‘popular’ crowd, but I do mix and am close to the decent beings that fall into those categories- and my ‘group’ does mix with them. I’m not the type of library-goer that spend lunch in the library and start to revise for End of Year exams in November.
One girl, who is a library goer, has started to hang around with us.
Its just really weird, she doesn’t say anything she just stands there listening to the conversation and following us about. It’s annoying when my group want to talk about things that concern just us and you kind of have to be discreet about it.
Every class where there’s a spare seat- she just sits with us… Doesn’t speak-or laugh- or join in the conversation- just sits there.
I’m still dreading my braces…metal in my mouth. 😦

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It’s Sunday…

Okay, this is really weird, but I’m about to talk about make up and clothing and shopping again… WHATS HAPPENING TO ME? FECK YOU HORMONES. FECK.YOU.
We went to A huge shopping centre in Belfast today, and it was the most productive days shopping I’ve got in my life.
There’s something satisfying about coming home with about five bagfuls’ worth of shopping in your arms- and even more satisfying knowing that you have the money to spend. I now understand shopping from a Woman’s point of view.

There is the biggest Debenhams store that I’ve ever seen in there, and my mother brought me to the wonderful world of the Cosmetic’s Floor.
As I mentioned, mother is a retraining Make up Artist, so she had to get some more kit for her make up collection and I was led to the madness that is MAC.
it was quite literally survival of the fittest and I can honestly say that I have never known how much lip liner can mean to a female.
After that, I walked over to a counter that is my home away from home- Benefit.
I love benefit products, I just do. So when I went over to see what new products were on offer, I struck up a conversation with the lovely girl at the counter- it was nice not being talked to like I was five, for example
“this is Badgal eyeliner, you line your lashline with it”
And I’m sat there thinking

“no shit sherlock, NO SHIT!”

I asked to see what a certain product would look like on my face.
I ended up getting a make over and agreeing to buy a completely different product when I comes out next week.
So I got a free make over! Woohoo!
Three outfits later I went to my dad and and he said I looked like I could get into a nightclub ID-free if I wanted to- that’s what passes for a complement nowadays.
A minging Ice mocha and toffee muffin after that, I bought some of that gel eyeliner stuff that everyones raving about. Maybe it’s Maybeline…or maybe it Photoshop- who knows?
I came home, tried all clothes on all over again, and tried on a pair of ‘extra skinny spray on jeans’ and I simply couldn’t walk. The situation was so bad I couldn’t get down the stairs and my toes turned blue. I was walking like Pingu until I took them off- which took a good fifteen minutes of wriggling and squirming- they are now back in the New Look bag with the receipt ready to be exchanged for the next size up.

Mother bought a pair of gorgeous nude heels today from Dune, I begged her to met me buy a pair, but she said I’d break my neck and anyone I came in contact’s with too. As you know, I’m more of a converse person, but I’d bought a particularly Girly outfit for a party and my mothers shoes would have went perfectly- I found a pair online that had a smaller heel but of course, they didn’t have the size of my big yeti feet in stock.

I’ve just realised today Is Sunday- meaning tomorrow is Monday…Ugh. After Monday comes Tuesday…and Tuesday means Swimming- so I’m pretty much on my knees praying to a god I don’t believe in (The Script reference Phaaahaaahaa!) that the snow, wind and rain will come so we don’t have to walk to the leisure centre.

Has anyone seen the new adverts for Friends? WTF is up with E4? They lost Glee to Sky1 and Friends to ComedyCentral- I have satellite tv but I feel sorry for those who don’t. I’m hoping The Big Bang Theory doesn’t go too

^ sorry- felt relevant

One Direction tickets were sold out in two minutes- so excuse me while I break down and cry.

I’ll now limit my Make Up posts. So don’t worry, business as Normal will resume soon- whatever the FECK normal is.

Irrelevant Facebook Like of The Day
“I wasn’t that drunk”-
Dude, you sat in my fireplace shouting “Diagon Alley”

NOTE: to the person who’s car I dented when I opened the car door forcefully;

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Make up? MAKE UP??!!

Well I kinda promised you this blog (not that there was a great demand for one), so here it is,
I don’t necessarily have anything to write about-nothing has happened to me apart from the fact I’m just back from the cinema after seeing I Don’t Know How She Does It for the second time in a month, which isn’t even a great film, and I swear if I see Sarah Jessica Parker one more time I will scream. I’d rather see the Inbetweeners again.
Why do I live my weekends out at the movies? Because in my crappy town, there’s nothing to do- we either walk about the town centre or go the cinema or we might stretch to the park if the weathers good. Yeah there’s youth clubs but they’re only on to about, 8pm- and the government wonders why theres so many Hoodies!
My day consisted of,
Wake up to sound of alarm clock
Hit snooze
Wake up
Get into school uniform and dry my hair.
Go down stairs and eat breakfast while watching DayBreak.
Brush teeth
Adjust hair
Go to school
Sit through history and RE and get out of double maths and head to orthodontist
In orthodontist, learn I’ll be losing a tooth and gaining some braces. In a weeks time.
Go back to school, sit through music and science.
Spend lunch teasing Shorty about his new love interest.
Sit through DT and babble my way through French
Go home and text friends
Eat dinner and text friends
Get ready for cinema
Go to cinema, watch movie, leave
Go to bed, write blog and hopefully sleep afterwards.
My life is very boring.

Before I went out I was putting on a bit of make up to cover up some zits when my mum walked in and offered to do my eye make up.

I knew how this would end

My mum is training to be a make up artist, she already has the qualifications shes just taking a course to update her skills.
” what eyeliner do you have?” she said
“err, black…” I replied- grimacing when I realised I’d just asked for a lecture, most consisting of “you should have more colour…you can’t live in t shirts and jeans forever…”
You see, my classic, typical look is

1. T-shirt with either a funny logo or a luminous colour

2. Jeans- preferably skinny and dark-wash

3. Something from my extensive collection (*cough* two pairs *cough*) of Converse All Stars- usually the silver ones.

4. Red hair in a messy bun or a (quite literally) ‘just got out of bed’ look

5. Black eyeliner on lower eye with a light coat of mascara and peachy lip gloss. Simple.

I have no idea why I’m telling you this I just am, I’m quite lucky that my mother understands a teenage needs to look good all the time, she let’s me wear make up and she freaking let me DYE MY OWN HAIR RED-but she does pull me back down to earth when required. She doesn’t mind me wearing make up,but within reason, foundation tide-lines that stop at the Jaw line and a blotchy liquid eyeliner job are just…no.
And I’m not the kind of person that goes for short, tight, skirts, false tan, eyelashes and nails, crop tops and bleached hair. In a way I’m the opposite but I’m like….frumpy, I’m not the complete Susan Boyle.
But going overboard on the makeup isn’t attractive at all. In fact, I hate it when boys spend ages gelling their hair (seriously lawds, what’s the appeal about putting GUNK in your hair?).
I don’t wear a lot of make up, I try my best to minimise my usage.

I’ve just realised I just made a blog about make up and clothes. I’d better go before I start plugging Barbie Dolls and fairies and unicorns and Miley Cyrus.

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Wednesday Recap for y’all

Easily said, today wasn’t as awesome as I anticipated, I was subject to humiliation on several occasions by the crowd of human beings I refer to as ‘friends’.

Has anyone heard of or listened to this really amazing band called Mumford & Sons? I’m actually in love with their album Sigh No More. The songs, Awake my soul, The Cave and of course the Best song EVER- Little Lion Man having been playing and repeated on my iPod for so long I think it’s going to explode. It’s not usually the type of music i listen too, but recently I’ve gone from Taylor Swift (I know, I know- take the piss all you want) to a girl who likes The Script, Snow Patrol, 30 seconds to mars, Florence & the machine, Paramore and of course Mumford & Sons. It’s proper unashamedly-dance-around-your-room music in my opinion. ( < WTF did I say 'in my opinion'?- everything on this blog is in and based on my opinion and sad excuse of an existence).

I've come to the realisation that tomorrow is my last day being non-teenage. And what an *ahem* eventful twelve years it has been! Let's see- significant events….well I learnt to walk, talk, potty trained, learned to write and count and all that jazz, moved schools, have been subject to two younger siblings and a few cousins, moved house, made friends, lost friends, made enemies, the list is endless- that and the fact I can't be arsed listing anymore.

As you lot know, I dyed my hair,like, a month back, and it was the CRAPPIEST COLOUR EVER I'm serious! 28 washes? 28 WASHES???! 28 WASHES MY BACKSIDE L'OREAL! It Lasted like six! So I switched brands and colours and I got soo many compliments (from complete randoms) it's quite unreal.

okay lawds, I'm off, got a big schedule, I've got sleeping to do and stuff. It's 10:30 over here ye'know and I've spent my afternoon drawing a kettle- so yeah, I'm wrecked.

"the awkward moment an Ireland player thinks the Aussie scrum half is a rugby ball and carries him ten foot up the pitch" Best.Moment.In.Rugby.History. Ever!!

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Major Cringe, but LOL

Me and my friends went to see The Inbetweeners Movie last night, I haven’t had the pleasure of watching the tv show, but by golly, it must be pretty rude if the movie was anything to go by.

It was a 15 movie, so me and my friends decided I should by the tickets-as I’m the tallest and I’d put about half a pencil’s worth of eyeliner on in the car to add on the years.

“All over 15?” the ticket man asked

“yep!” I said, I mean, did he expect me to say no?

So five thirteen year olds marched into the movie that we had been warned was extremely funny and brilliant- but really rude. Well I knew I would be ok, my parental unit wouldn’t hate me, they knew I’d seen and heard ruder. And I got ALL the gory details of the birds and the bees in science last year.

Jesus christ, it was very very inappropriate. It was bloody hilarious, but my god, they could have toned it down a BIT.
This is my second viewing of a 15 movie, I somehow got into Bridesmaids
Earlier this year, and it wasn’t even that bad, it was more the language.
I know I sound like such a bloody blanket, but I had to voice my opinion on this.

It was very funny, (is it weird that I find Simon from the Inbetweeners attractive?) but I think I’ll read up movies before I read the tickets.
It’s safe to say Will and Neil are the funniest.

And ill never trust anyone to rub sun screen on my back again. LOL.

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Bits and bobs WILL RUIN YOUR LIFE!

My mother is quite a clean freak.
She just can’t stand clutter. It drives her crazy, so in that sense I don’t take after my mum.
I personally don’t mind a bit of clutter, it adds a personal touch- well that and I can’t be bothered getting off my arse and picking it up. This evening, mum did her usually bedroom inspection while I sat on the bed texting.
“there’s still bits and bobs on the floor, you need to pick them up,” she’d said warningly.
“its only bits and bobs, ma, calm the bap woman!” I spluttered shaking my head.
” maybe to you, but bits and bobs build up and build up into a huge mess which I’ll end up tidying!” my mother then proceeded to give me the raised eyebrow ‘don’t argue with me on this matter’ look.
Yet my parents think I don’t think things through. If I constantly ignore my mothers rants about my untidiness, she will eventually end up tidying it up herself, and then gives me a big talk about how ‘this is the very last time’ and ‘i should take more responsibility’ blah blah blah.
Maybe I like my PERSONAL space to have my PERSONAL belongings splayed on the floor.
Maybe I like having yesterday’s clothes hanging on the chair.
Maybe, just maybe, I like having books piled high on….well…just about everything.

I suppose the point I’m trying to get at here is, i do things a certain way for a certain reason- an that is that it’s just me. And I was born this way baby!*

* soz for the cheesy gaga quote, and btw, did you see the VMAs? Seriously Gaga, what was up with the ‘acting like a man’ thing?? Well anythings better than a meat dress.

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Why Males aren’t as complicated as we think

Any girl who is at least thirteen, or maybe even younger should have at least one boy as a one of their closest friends.
I can honestly say I prefer boys to girls, I’m not very Girly, I spend my life in skinny jeans and converse- and completely proud of it. With girls, I feel you constantly have to keep up standards, even with friends, you always feel pressure to keep being the funny one or the ditsy one, or the clumsy one
( in my case its the sarcastic ever so slightly neurotic, nerdy one) .
With male kind, conversation is 60% about banter 30% about sport and 10% about girls (and frankly, I love those odds)
The banter part is where I’m ‘at’.
I have quite a masculine sense of humour, sitting up late, watching stand up on tv with my dad, Mock the Week, Live at the Apollo, you name it, I’ve Sky+’d it.
Boys get it, they get the jokes, unlike females, they aren’t afraid to say stuff without being afraid of sounding stupid!
My girlfriends think I’m crazy, they can’t understand why all I see when I look at my boy-mates is a friend, they don’t see why I don’t flirt or see these alien species as some kind of puzzle.
But they’re not puzzles. I Don’t understand why all these girl magazines say stuff like “10 things to make him LOOOVE YOU!” or “Body language signs he’s soo into you” It kind of bugs me… I mean, their not fricken animals, their just people.
I mean, I get offended boys drooling over girls in ,ahem, certain magazines, so can’t imagine what’s it like when they realise their every move is being analysed, it’s pretty weird.
Also, less arguments with boys!
Girls have an awful habit of stretching the truth and making things more complicated by adding and subtracting to situations. Constant bitching, something I just can’t stand.
When it comes to disagreements, and the following is a quote from a boy-mate of mine, “girls make it into such a drama… Boys just shout at each other or punch and it’s over” ( LOL)

But be wary, some people, when they see a boy and a girl having a good time, assume their dating or their something other than friendship. This happens to me every single day of my school life, my closest boy is a laugh, and I like a laugh, yet people are always trying to get us to date.
(and frankly, i shudder at the thought). He’s like my brother!

So, Breaking News, Boys aren’t as complicated as their made out to be.
It’s all inside our heads ladies.
I’m not saying I’ve got them 100% sussed out, but I hope I’m half way there.

Any thoughts? I wanna hear them- you know what to do.

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